Home from Camp

It started raining just as I arrived home. After our busy camping weekend, I thought of Freda playing on the Entertainment barn’s keyboard,  I was now pleased to finally be able to shut out the world around me. The last two hours had been particularly stressful. Visiting the ‘Red Lion’ on our way home had not been a great idea.

After helping to calm down a tearful and pregnant Rosie, advising her she did not need to kill boyfriend Freddie, he is not worth the effort. I had then taken Freda home, she had been affected by Rosie’s upset. In case you don’t know our story, Freda is my best friend and she is not well at present. After suffering a bout of depression, I found her unconscious with an empty bottle of ‘Bells Whisky’ next to her. She has been referred for counselling, but this is not helping.

I’m a musician and will sing and play the piano in pubs and clubs. Freda has now joined me, she is a terrific pianist and as she plays her demeaner changes. Her face will turn from a frown to a smile as she listens to the rhythm.

My thoughts

Listening to the rain fall outside I made myself a warm mug of tea. Drowning the teabag with boiling water I once again thanked the heavens, that all was alright with me. I was concerned for Freda, but I knew she would be alright too. Rosie needed to stay strong and continue to ignore Freddie’s demands. I have learnt, it is important in life to follow your gut, you need to do what is right for you. If you live to please others, you will not be happy, that little voice in your head will always be disagreeing with what is happening and that is a difficult unhappy place to live in.

Mark

Our weekend, had not quite been the break I had planned. I had not been interested in finding a partner. I am happily single, happy managing my singing business, so meeting Mark had made me feel uncertain. I’m not ready to have my heart broken again and I hardly know him. The thing is though, he is nice looking and he seemed like a good person. Also, just thinking about him, my heart skips so I know that I need to take the risk and let him into my life. I can’t stay single forever, I have to risk being hurt, and maybe he is the one that I’m meant to be with. Smiling at this thought, I’m now in my early thirties so why not?

Legs up on the settee, I finished my tea and put the mug down on the floor. Lying back I cuddled down into the comfortable cushions and closed my eyes. Exhaustion had taken over and I now gave into it as a relaxed sensation as I was welcomed by the land of dreams.

Freda

Home alone with Labrador Rex, she put the television on and reflected on things. Having suffered recent heartbreak from a long-term relationship with two timing John, she was happy for Ruby but hoped she was not about to undergo the same intense pain. ‘Jeremy Kyle’ was not helping her to organise her thoughts and she changed the channel. ‘Emmerdale’ on catch up would have to do, escape from the reality of real life.

Rex sat head on his paws, he had had a good time away and was now content to watch his mistress with her feet on the settee staring at the television. He knew she had been unhappy, he had sensed that there was something not right with John before it had all fell apart.

Freda had taken down all his photos but couldn’t help thinking about him. The breakup had been unexpected, and she had felt like she was run down by a truck, if it wasn’t for Ruby she didn’t like to think where she would be. Nobody seemed to truly understand how she was feeling, and the patronising counsellor did not help, and Citalopram was not going to take away her happy memories of John and then the hurt he had caused her.

Keyboard and music

Sitting now she asked herself, what next? She looked around her flat, at the tired furniture and now her beloved dog staring up at her. She needed a plan, music made her happy but she could not forever depend on Ruby for that fix. Thinking about the piano and how it made her feel she considered buying one, then another thought occurred to her. An upright piano is not practical, but she could store a piano keyboard under her bed.

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Freda knew that making impulse purchases like this was not clever, she knew her credit card was not healthy as she logged into her Amazon account. As an excellent pianist she needed something nice, she knew that her music made her feel something that ‘Citalopram’ never could. Going through checkout she thought again about her impulse purchase, but she knew that she needed this. Relieved for prime delivery she was happy to see it would arrive the next day.

Excited now about her new keyboard and thinking about her music she told herself not to worry about her credit card, she would pay it, eventually. She worked part time in a department store, which helped to pay her rent. Ruby was not able to pay her but for Freda it was therapy to join her friend and play the piano alongside her.

Freda’s plan

She knew that she had to escape her ‘depressive funk’ and now she thought about what she had wanted from life. Thinking about ‘Bucks Fizz’ and ‘Abba’, she had always wanted to write her own music, John had always told her that she was not good enough and she had believed him. Reaching for her notebook and pen, she now made a list with the title, ‘How to get myself out of my mess’.
1. Enjoy my keyboard, play every evening.
2. To write some songs and the music, with the help of my keyboard.
3. Talk to Ruby, she could sing my songs.

Stopping now she wondered if Ruby would really sing her songs. She knew she would tell her off for her extravagant purchase, but she knew that she needed this.

Ruby

Woken from sleep I could hear ringing. Then feeling a vibration by my leg, I realised it was my phone. Answering it, I hoped Freda was alright.
“Hello, you okay”. I heard an excited voice,
“Ruby, I’ve made decision.”
I sat up now, “Okay what have you done?’
“I’ve bought a keyboard and Amazon will deliver it tomorrow.”

I bit my tongue I know how much she owes the Halifax, but I understood why she had bought it. “Okay, so what is your plan with it.”
“I’m going to use it to write music and songs, Ruby will you sing them?” I know Freda is talented, but I have never read or heard any of her songs.
“Slow down, how about I come over tomorrow and we look at your new keyboard together. Let’s not rush into anything but this could be a good idea. Will make a change from the songs that I will usually sing.”
“Okay, thanks Ruby, I will let you know when it has been delivered.”
“Yes, give me a call.”

We spoke for a while longer and then said goodbye. Standing up, I looked at the clock, 8pm, the afternoon had passed, and my thoughts turned to Mark. I wondered how long it would be before he messaged me. I was determined not to message him first.

The text

It was a couple of hours later as I drank my evening hot chocolate that my phone vibrated again. My heart leapt as I could see it said, ‘hello, thinking of you, Mark’. I asked myself if I should reply straight back and then told myself I was too old for games. Smiling happily, I texted him back, I wondered where this was leading and then told myself to stop thinking about it, relax and enjoy what happens next.

Written for Grammys Grid sentence prompt – It started raining just as I….

For more see, A camping weekend and a new man – Ruby and Freda part four. Please note this is Part five of a five part story.